A precious gift for McNallys
Published on September 17th, 2003
STONEHAM, MA - The wonder of a worn tennis ball rolling down a driveway's gentle slope, having been sprung from the chubby hand of a baby, is just one of the pleasures a child might experience on an idyllic Sunday morning in late summer before the chill of autumn begs us to stop the fun to grab a jacket.
Such was the scene playing out in the McNally family's backyard on North Street this weekend and likely all over town as families enjoyed the last breaths of summer. But the joy that creased the faces of John, Bernadette, and little Sophie McNally was born of more than just the beauty of the day. The McNally's joy was truly in being together.
Sophie Jian Wei McNally takes a visitor by the hand and leads him around her yard. "Ball," "Dad," "sit," she practices in the sometimes inaudible language of a toddler. Pointing out all that is familiar, it is as if she has been here all her life. Yet, despite this awareness of her surroundings, the little 21 month-old girl arrived in the United States just over six months ago.
Sophie was born a long way from the home she knows today, on November 25, 2001 in the Jiangxi Province in Southern China. Because of that country's laws forbidding families to have more than one child, Sophie, like many Chinese babies, was left in a safe place by her biological mother where she was immediately found, taken care of and, at two days old, placed into foster care.
Sophie's adoptive mother, Bernadette, credits that foster home with giving her daughter excellent care and helping her on her way to becoming a happy, healthy, extroverted girl.
"I'd say she had a wonderful foster mother...The first year is so important...She's very well adjusted, really."
John and Bernadette adopted Sophie in February and from the start, they knew she was the child for them.
"I can't imagine any other child," Bernadette said of the little girl who loves the outdoors and came to be the daughter of two people raised in the countryside of Ireland.
John, a commercial painting contractor, hails from County Kildaire and arrived in the United States in 1984. Bernadette is a nurse recruited by Winchester Hospital who came over from County Monaghan in 1987. The two met at a wedding in 1993 and have called Stoneham home for the past nine years.
Bernadette's philosophy is simple, "When something is meant to happen, it will."
When having a child of their own did not come to pass, the McNallys decided on adoption. Through friends, they learned of The Alliance for Children, a nonprofit international adoption agency, which holds the distinction of being Massachusetts' first international adoption agency.
Since 1974, The Alliance for Children has placed thousands of children, from countries such as China, Columbia, Ecuador, Vietnam, Guatemala, and the Ukraine, with American families. The principle that drives and underlies the work at The Alliance is that all children have a right to permanent loving families of their own. The Alliance for Children provides service to birth families, children, and adoptive families. In addition, The Alliance provides financial assistance to orphanages to improve the living conditions of children awaiting placement. In 2000, The Alliance For Children Foundation was created to establish programs in various countries aimed at improving the health, education and welfare of these children to ensure better success in life beyond the orphanage environment.
From the first open meeting they attended, the McNallys were impressed with The Alliance for Children. They decided to work with the agency in adopting a child from China, and embarked on a journey through mountains of paperwork, home visits, background checks and letters of reference, all of which ultimately brought them to Sophie.
"They basically want to account for your whereabouts since the age of 18," John explained.
The McNallys completed their dossier which was eventually accepted and they inched closer to getting a child. But the paperwork and legal wrangling was only beginning on the other side of the ocean and there was nothing more the McNallys could do before that process was completed.
"That's probably the hardest part - that year you have to sit and wait," John said.
At last, a picture arrived at the McNally's home, and a little Chinese girl stared back at them. Soon they could pick up their Sophie.
Chinese New Year caused delays and the McNallys could not journey to China in January of this year as planned. But, as Bernadette has come to believe, that original trip was not meant to be, for on January 21, John's father died in Ireland and John flew home to lay his dad to rest.
Upon John's return, the McNallys got word that it was time to go to China. From the moment their plane landed, the McNallys received great assistance, from transportation to translation, made possible by The Alliance. In a hotel in Nanchang, they first saw their little girl. John, Bernadette and Sophie McNally were together at last.
For another week or so, they fulfilled all legal requirements, including obtaining a passport and birth certificate for Sophie in the McNally's name and enjoyed the swearing in of Sophie Jian Wei McNally as an American citizen at the American Embassy in Guangzhou. Their trek home lasted 26 hours as they flew from Nanchang into Hong Kong, on to Newark and finally into Boston.. Sophie traveled extremely well as did the 40 or 50 other Chinese children who were going to new homes with their adoptive parents.
"From day one, she was not strange with us," Bernadette said of her daughter who has entertained McNally family and friends since she arrived home on February 21. This summer, Sophie traveled to Ireland with her mother to meet more family members.
Reflecting on their journey, Bernadette expressed her opinion on a variety of issues she might have been less clear on not too long ago.
She knows her joy has been born of another woman's sorrow in having to give up a baby that the Chinese government disallowed.
"Those poor women are giving them up because they're forced to. It's a major injustice...It's very sad in this day and age."
While in China, the McNallys discovered that despite overcrowding in the orphanages they visited, the children were generally well cared for and orphanage improvements are made with donations and through the work of organizations such as The Alliance.
"They need more people working (in the orphanages) and more children to come out and come out earlier."
The average Chinese person also cares about these children, the McNallys learned. While walking down the street with Sophie during their stay in China, the McNallys were stopped by many Chinese people who wanted to be sure the child was sufficiently warm.
"They would say "beautiful girl, lucky girl, you are so kind,'" Bernadette said.
When Sophie was first brought to them, she was dressed in many layers of worn clothing. But John and Bernadette instantly learned that the condition of the clothes could not mask the love and care Sophie received from her foster home.
"What she didn't have in clothes, she had in love from that foster mother," Bernadette said.
To other families considering adoption, John gives this advice: "Talk to people who've already been there, get advice. For the most part, everything (the Alliance) said, was right. It was a very positive experience for us."
"Anyone who is in limbo...just go for it. She's brought us a lot of happiness," Bernadette added.
Sophie is thriving in Stoneham. She has grown 3 inches in 6 months, eats well, and begins each day by kissing a picture of herself.
"We knew whatever baby we got was going to be the right one for our home," said Bernadette. "She has been such a blessing. She's a wonderful little girl."
As for Sophie's future, the McNallys want what all parents want - happiness, health, and education. They would also like her to learn of her Chinese culture and language and someday hope to take Sophie back to China. For now, Bernadette hopes to meet other families in the area with Chinese children.
"We tell her we went to China and brought her back in an airplane," Bernadette says on this glorious Sunday as she dances with her daughter in the yard.
The tennis ball is forgotten for a moment, for overhead the roar of an airplane's engine distracts Sophie who looks up and points.
"Airplane," the toddler says clearly.
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